STATUE: Because they think the police might steal it. Because the alarm is a motion detector and they're using it as an earthquake predictor.

SOLARIUM: Extend the basement a few feet past the first floor, and use sunroom panels (seen a number of floorplans that do this, actually). Lights. Built on a hill so one wall of the basement can be solid windows to let the light in.

POLICE: You could expect me to hang up the phone. I might also ask if they have stolen the statue.